It all started one cold winter Saturday evening. There was a Mav, a Goosie, and several shots of jager, tequila, sour vodka, sour jacks, and some shit you light on fire (cause that is always a good idea). Well one thing leads to another and another bright idea comes truckin along to play rock band in our tiny apartment at 3 am in the morning. Next thing I remember is the sounds of dribbling hitting a floor. Like you know the sounds where you’re like holy shit the sink is overflowing and you hear it dribbling. So I jump outta bed and look down my bedroom hallway, which leads to facing the laundry room. The laundry door is slightly propped open, light is on and all I see is Mavie’s g-string, naked leg, and half bum kind of squatting beside the deep freezer. Here is the Dialogue that continued to happen:
Goosie is like, “Dude its 6 am in the morning, what the F**K are you doing in the laundry room”.
Mavie looks at me with disgust…like I am the one asking the most asinine question out there.
Gossie says “Mav your pissing on the laundry room floor dude….wtf are you doing”
Mavie says with a disgusted look again, “I am taking a piss man”!
Gossie, “ Ya but you’re in the fuckin laundry room pissing on the floor”
Mavie “Ya well there are a lot of people out there”
Gossie, “Um it’s just you and me here now. It’s 6 am, everyone is gone and we own two bathrooms that you can use”…..( I am now laughing and pissing myself in my room, cause she still has this look like WTF is gossie’s problem). Mavie looks around at the floor, pulls up her pants, walks to her bathroom, continues to pee, then just walks right back into her room and passes out. 4 hours later I get out of bed walk into the living room and there is Mav eating her granola bar and juice like nothing happened.
Goosie, “So that was an interesting night”
Mavie, “Meh it was okay. I was kinda drunk though”
Gossie, “Ya I can’t believe you pissed on the laundry room floor dude, make sure you clean that shit up. Again, a disgusted look like huh????
Mavie, “What are you talking about”?
Gossie, “Ya man for real you pissed all over the laundry room floor. I have heard of guys being drunk and doing it in a corner, but you pissed on the laundry room floor man.”
Moral of the blog.....if you have a roommate that likes her tequila and can’t hold her bladder, don’t leave clothes on the laundry room floor.
Till Next Time
umm just to be clear goosie was shit faced and possibly heard wrong and... when i went to clean up the floor the next morning there was nothing there. im thinking she was halucinating lol
ReplyDeleteUm ya cause my clothes and towels that were on the floor soaked that shit up.
ReplyDelete